An important lesson: There is always leverage.
Some examples:
- Fear of deadlines
- Power of odd numbers
- Views on fairness
Don’t Compromise
(GTY Bashing: Always told to look for “win-win” and splitting the difference)
Win-win doesn’t work well against someone who has a win-lose approach.
Don’t compromise if your reason is that it’s easy or you’re trying to save face. Or so you can say you got half the pie. Most people compromise in order to feel safe.
Deadlines: Make Time Your Ally
Don’t let a deadline cause you to go into a panic. Rarely are the consequences of missing it as severe as thought. They are often arbitrary, and usually flexible.
Hiding a deadline increases the risk of an impasse. Don’t hide your deadline. It puts pressure on the other side as well (but does it always?). Hiding it will lead you to be more likely to concede.
The F Word: Why It’s So Powerful, When to Use it, and How
1st Use
“We just want what’s fair” is usually a move to manipulate you. They are subtly implying that what you want is unfair.
On the flip side, you could use their strategy on others (but can it backfire?)
If someone says it to you, it may be that they really feel you’re being unfair. So respond with: “Let’s pause and go back to where I treated you unfairly (and we’ll fix it)”.
2nd Use
It can be intended to make you defensive: “We’ve given you a fair offer.” Respond with “Fair?” Pause. Then label: “It seems you’re ready to provide evidence to support that.”
3rd Use
Say “I want you to feel like you are being treated fairly at all times. Please stop me any time you feel I’m being unfair and we’ll address it.”
This signals to the other side that it’s OK to use the word.
How To Discover The Emotional Drivers Behind What The Other Party Values
Sales tip: If you know someone’s needs, reframe their needs in a manner that makes your solution natural. Restate their needs in this fashion.
Bend Their Reality
Utilize loss aversion.
Utilize preference for certainty over probability.
Know that people prefer probability when it comes to losing something, and certainty when it comes to gaining something.
In a tough negotiation, don’t just show the other what they will gain. Show them what they will lose (but not as a threat).
1. Anchor Their Emotions
Start with an accusation audit of their fears. This gets them into loss aversion mode.
Example: Tell them you have a lousy proposition, and they’ll think you’re a loser, etc. Then say: “I want to offer this to you before I offer it to anyone else.”
This will trigger loss aversion even if it is a crappy deal.
2. Let The Other Guy Go First … Most of the Time
Often in salary negotiations, let the other side go first. Beware of the anchor effect, though. Especially let the other side go first if you don’t know the market well. They may well offer more than you believed you could get.
Sometimes it’s OK to go first (e.g. if you know the arena well). But avoid extreme anchoring. You may get a bad reputation.
3. Establish a Range
Don’t give one value. Give a range.
“At places like X, people get paid in the range Y to Z.” Make sure you’re OK with Y, though. This is to your benefit if Z is really high.
4. Pivot to Nonmonetary Terms
If they can’t meet your number, do they have something else of value to you? Or can you offer something else?
5. When You Do Talk Numbers, Use Odd Ones
Don’t give round numbers.
6. Surprise With a Gift
Go with a fairly low anchor. When rejected, offer a completely unrelated (and cheap to you) gift on top of it. Often they’ll take the deal. The power of reciprocity works here.
Example: Kidnapper wants a lot of money. Say you can only give X amount, where X is low. When rejected, throw in a new stereo you have.
How To Negotiate a Better Salary
Be Pleasantly Persistent on Nonmonetary Terms
You must be pleasant and not annoying. Ask with a big smile (even on phone).
If you persist on non-salary items (e.g. sabbatical), you’ll get to hear a wider range of options from their side. They may even compensate by offering a higher salary.
Salary Terms Without Success Terms Is Russian Roulette
After negotiating a salary, negotiate the metrics for your next raise.
Spark Their Interest In Your Success And Gain an Unofficial Mentor
The manager is taking a risk by hiring you. He is investing in your success. So ask:
“What does it take to be successful here?”
Use this exact wording!
Miscellaneous
If the other side says “No”, keep talking, labeling, and empathizing. But don’t say “Not good enough.”
If you get a good offer, make statements expressing something positive (e.g. “Let’s work to make the partnership fruitful” but better).